I pity the man who has to love me after you.
He will show up on my doorstep with roses, ready and eager to erase the bad taste you left in my mouth.
He will say all the right things at the right time, only to be eventually frustrated that I do not respond to his romantic overtures, because even the rivers of sweetness he pours over me will forever be overpowered by the bitterness your name left on my tongue.
He will have to deal with the nightmares that leave me voiceless from screaming, but he will not be able to chase them away. You were the only one who could send me into a dreamless sleep- until you became the monster that haunts me now. He, unfortunately, will only be able to give my voice back to me so I can scream it away again.
He will hold me on my cold days, and I will enjoy the warmth for a while. But it will be nothing compared to the fire that I felt stirring in your heart when my head laid on your chest.
He will do his best to show me that love is not the dark, twisted thing that you brought out in me. He will try to show me the beauty in the light of the moon, only to be disappointed when I can only bask in the shadows.
He will wonder why I ever loved you- you, who plucked my wings and ravaged my back with scars from the knife you repeatedly plunged into it. He will ponder this as he works to stitch up every gaping wound, astounded when they do not close and heal, but instead reopen and continue to bleed.
And eventually, like all others, he will leave. dumbfounded and sick of being haunted by a demon that wasn’t even his.
AN: This is one of the darkest things I’ve written in a while. Most of the time, the things I write correlate directly to how I feel, but I can honestly say that while this definitely came from feelings that I’ve had, I haven’t felt like this in regards to love in quite a while. I’ve healed from what the last owner of my heart did to me, I’ve put all the broken pieces back together and I did it all by my self. (With a lot of help from solid girlfriends). I wrote this to let go of the last little bit of unhealthy devotion I felt to Him, to finally exorcise the demon that’s been inhabiting itself in my thoughts. Of course you all will see that I never quite stop writing about love and heartbreak, but from now own it won’t be from my perspective or from my feelings. I’m finally done whining and crying about the unfairness of life and love, instead I’ll be highlighting the good in the bad and the bad in the good.